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I have been building my coaching business for a few years now and I am doing it backwards.
I have paid thousands of dollars for marketing / sales systems and funnels- to learn about how to sell my "products" only to quit halfway through...
I have listened to and watched The gurus who have given me the
"I help_______ do ________ so they can________" formula and tried to make my business fit into this little box... only to fail to fill in the blanks.
I have been told to pick one specific person, at one place in their journey, to do one specific thing, and get one specific outcome… but I get bored...
I'm doing it 'wrong:'
I suck at creating content consistently.
I struggle with perfectionism.
I get bursts of motivation and create a bunch of content at once and then ignore my social media for weeks at a time.
I hate email.
I refuse to 'hit em where it hurts."
I teach too much.
And I'm not going to 'fix' this.... and here's why:
(Photo by Soulful Pizza: https://www.pexels.com/photo/crop-unrecognizable-person-showing-middle-finger-in-darkness-5762828/)
In my coaching business, I do something invisible.
I don't promise to teach you how to make 10k in 90 days... I won't help you lose 10lbs in 30 days... I don't teach you how to do handstands... or find a boyfriend, quit your corporate job.... or anything with a specific tangible outcome. This is a marketing gurus worst nightmare and it's where my business was stalled for so long. Until I stopped trying to 'fix it'- and I started to just get back to doing what I do best: fucking helping people.
It is difficult for me to describe what I do in one clear and concise sentence of 140 charactors or less (especially not without using all kinds of BS jargon or sounding like I am selling rainbows and unicorns) and sometimes it's even hard for me to do it in 3 paragraphs, because it's complicated and it means something differnt to everyone, but here goes:
I help women who have experienced trauma, sexual abuse, sexual assault, domestic violence, narcissistic control... who are struggling with symptoms like anxiety, frustration, panic, overwhelm and can't seem to regain control... who feel like they are losing their minds- going crazy- and can't find a way out.
I also help women who have been living from one crisis to the next for a really long time. It seems like no matter how hard they try, they can't seem to get their shit together- they are struggling with shame, anxiety, lack of focus, and they are exhausted and are just trying to get ahead...
I ALSO help women who are sick and fucking tired of letting their trauma hold them back... who are ready to break through the invisible barriers that have been holding them back from living their dreams of running a business, or achieving a really big goal, who are ready to become the person they were meant to be before their trauma derailed their life.
AND I have a huge fucking goal to impact 10k women this year so, I have decided that I am also going to teach my process to other women who are trying to help even more women do things in their life and are struggling to get results because their trauma symptoms are holding them back.
Now all the gurus tell me to pick one and help them. They tell me that the best way for me to grow my business is to choose the one in the most pain and charge a premium price and promise them one specific outcome. They have told me to set a goal for how much money I want to make and divide that number by how many clients I can help at once and that's what I should charge.
That might be good marketing- but I don’t believe that is good business, so I refuse to do that!
When I tell them I don't have an income goal - they tell me I am doing it wrong...
When I tell them I have a goal to impact 10k women this year- they tell me that's impossible with 562 instagram followers and 2 subscribers and zero videos on Youtube.(I'm working on it!)
I'm not a rebel without a cause, I'm not pretending that I know marketing, or branding, or that I'm some social media influencer.... I'm not fooling myself into thinking I know it all about business...
But I do know my people.
I know what it feels like to be in crisis mode, to not know which way is up... to feel like you are losing your mind, going crazy, living on edge all the time, desperate for some sense of control.
And I know what it feels like when that feeling passes and it starts to feel like you can breathe again... but then something in your world comes crashing down and then there is the fear that this is gonna be the thing that takes you out. I know what it feels like to live from one crisis to the next, crying myself to sleep at night, wondering “why does this keep happening to me ?!” and desperately wanting something better for my life.
But I also know what it feels like when you finally regain control of your life and it feels like you are no longer at the mercy of fate, looking over your shoulder, when you are no longer triggered by the tiniest things, and when your life begins to reflect your dreams...
And I know what it feels like to teach this to other women- and watch them break their barriers and live bigger and better lives... to finally feel like themselves- to feel like superheros in their own story.
I also know that these outcomes look different for everyone and sometimes these outcomes are invisible- or impossible to imagine if you are just starting your healing journey.
That's why I don't promise to double your income, or lose weight, or fix your relationship, because I know that all of those "problems" people are trying to solve are just symptoms of a deeper problem- and that problem is universally known as trauma. I don’t help you soothe your symptoms - I help you attack the problem at the root and subtract the trauma from your life, however it is showing up.
I also know that people in the deepest pain often have the least amount of resources, but as a coach I know this is where I can make the biggest impact... so I do this backwards.
That's why my services cost more, the less you need them, but the more you want them.
I will say that again; I charge more for programs that help you reach your goals, and less (or sometimes zero) for programs that are designed to help you get out of pain.
Yes, this is ass-backwards from everything we have ever been taught about marketing and business and even personal development, and it may be why you have bought into someone’s promises of rainbows and unicorns, only to wind up broke, and feeling broken.
In my experience, people who are struggling with the most severe symptoms- who are still in the aftermath crisis might feel the most desperate for relief, but also often have limited resources. Many lack money, but also they often lack time and emotional energy and mental bandwidth.
Charging them a premium and delivering an onslaught of information, trying to get them to see the bigger picture and giving them exercises and homework for days, does not work... it would be unethical to take their money and tell them - “ok you have all the tools- go make it happen.” They aren’t ready to receive this. In fact, I believe that this is one of the pitfalls of Therapy.
I once got into a debate with a Cognitive Behavioral Therapist who argued with the statistic that CBT fails over 70% of the time for traumatized adults.* Her defense was that “It works if you do the work.” My entire point was that people coming into therapy with engrained trauma aren't always ready or able to “do the work” and often leave feeling deeper despair and shame.
As a coach, I have a different mindset than that particular therapist (and I'm sure many others who mean well, but have been taught to operate within a very specific protocol.) I feel that it is my job to meet you where you are at, and leave no woman behind!
I have always found it interesting that it is common to say - “I go to therapy”; as opposed to “I have a coach.” The distinction seems minor, however I think this illustrates my point well. As a couch, it is my job to meet you where you are at, and find the right tools that you can work with. For me, it is because I have not only walked in your shoes, I have run that marathon, and I know where all the potholes are, and hills, and also the finish line, and I know you have to take it one step at a time. Simply put- I get you, and I’ve got you!
That’s why 87% of my coaching is free including this blog, my YouTube channel (and all that I hope it to be), my social media, podcast interviews I do, and even the free support calls I offer to ANYONE who needs . All of these resources are designed to meet you where you are- at different stages in your healing journey.
All that being said- I do sell things, I do run a business and I am grateful to make money helping women overcome their trauma and reach their full potential. Income allows me the time, energy and resources to keep effecting change in my community.
I offer products with low barriers to entry ranging from $27.99 to $249.00, like books and workbooks, low-cost workshops and I run group programs to make it accessible to as many people as possible. I do beleive that the more you invest in yourself the bigger transformation you will experience. Where you may not have the financial resources, you can invest your time and desire.
I also sell high-ticket one-on-one coaching, as well as retreats, that range from $2,520.00 to $12,600.00 where you get direct access to me and tailored program for you that draws a straight line directly to your goals and we don't stop until you get there.
My purpose on this planet is to help you become yourself, minus trauma.
We start where you are and we don’t stop until we arrive at where you want be and it would be my fucking pleasure to join you on your journey!
~ XO Arci
Sources *Bessel Van Der Kolk- The Body Keeps the Score